you called the wrong sister Girlfriend

family, funny, Good Eats, humor, life, relationships, single, sister


So here's the deal. I'm completely able to entertain myself.  Which is why I don't have a large circle of friends.  Many acquaintances, but only a few that are close friends.

So when I get off work at 3 in the afternoon, I head my tukus home and park it for 6 more hours until bedtime.  Not that I'm opposed to going out for drinks, or putting myself in a position to meet someone interesting, or otherwise spend money I really don't have, I just don't have a high tolerance for small you-just-wasted-an-hour-of-my-life-that-I'll-never-get-back chit chat. 

You follow?

So, last night I'm transitioning from my park-it spot in the comfy chair to the other park-it spot in front of the computer.  To catch up on social networking, blogging, and otherwise time wasting.  Because the game just came on and I follow it better when it's the secondary draw instead of the primary draw of my attention.  Whatever whatever.

I pull up HelloGiggles because they have incredibly giggly articles about, well, funny things.  That are girly.  And I relate to them. I hear the sports announcer make some reference to Dirk Noringski at the same I see a tweet from DearExGirlfriend regarding the very same Dallas Mavericks player.  I giggle.  I reply to said fellow blogger.  He replies back.  I laugh out loud.  

I'm so glad I moved to the computer. Plus, because of the perfume samples I yanked out of a magazine, it smells good over here.  Like, really good.

My phone rings.  Which it never does.  And I'm so glad I changed my ringtone to the Dropkick Muprhys.  Totally awesome move on my part.  I pick up my phone, rock out for a few seconds, and then answer it before it goes to voicemail.  And because there are children playing outside my window and they are starting to stare.  I'm sure they think I'm seizing.

It's my sister.  She's looking for the recipe for No-Bake Cookies.  Because her daughter has a craving and she can't find her copy.   I'm racking my bank of baking memories (they are many) to see if I even have the recipe.  I don't recall having made them in… more than 10 years.  And never by myself. My response to her inquiry?

You called the wrong sister Girlfriend.  And then I bust up laughing.

Get it?  Because I'm her sister.  And our other sister is the one who makes (or made them) all the time.  And I've never made them.  And we're sisters.  

Ok.  Moving on.

I'm thinking at some point I got the recipe from mom because it's just one of those ones that you should have.  So I double check my stash and TaDa! I have it.  


And then that quickly, I've done inventory of my minimal baking supplies and I decide I have everything I need and dogwongchong I'm gonna make me some No-Bake Cookies too!  

Woot woot!

And then I continue to laugh with my sister uncontrollably for… 4 minutes.  Seriously.  Laughing.  Like the holding-my-side-because-it-hurts and if-I-snort-one-more-time-I'm-gonna-fall-on-the-ground kind of laughing.  And I can't even remember what we were talking about.

Then she asked me how much sugar I had eaten.  And was there someone else there making me laugh?  The answers were none and nope.  And while I'm trying to calm down enough to read her the recipe, and we keep busting up in laughter, her husband finds her copy of the recipe.  So she doesn't need it from me anymore.  Which makes the whole situation completely funny again on a totally different level that I can't even begin to explain to you.

You see, she called at the exact time I needed her to.  

Why?  Because I have a corny sense of humor and have a knack for completely terrible jokes.  And the work day was rough.  I had some pent up really bad humor!  

Even after we hung up the phone I continued to laugh.  For a long time.  The whole thing was so completely random and un-funny that the hilarity of the situation increased.

Kinda like the time I emailed the same sister information about a new guy in my life. Except that I emailed the information to my 20-something male co-worker in NY instead.  Yeah.  Funny.

See?  Who needs to go out to the bar and be in awkward chit chat conversation with random dudes when I can stay home and laugh at myself all night?  

Because if I don't go out and put myself in those awkward situations I'll never meet a guy who thinks I'm as stupidly funny and I do.  And that's just a non-negotiable.

ps – I totally made No-Bake Cookies.  But I didn't have all the ingredients.  But the butter was already melted so I ran, well walked, to the store and got some milk.  And they totally rocked.