early mornings and late nights

adjustment, change, life, meditation, morning person, schedule, school, The U

It's been a long time since I actually blogged first thing in the morning. I used to get up at 5:30 regularly for the express purpose of waking up slowly.  I enjoy a leisurly wake up padding around the house drinking my coffee and eating breakfast. To think that I would get up extra early to be able to do that makes me laugh a little.

The dogs wake me up pretty regularly at 6:00 a.m. I don't mind, I still like being up in the early morning. There's something peaceful about the dark hours that happen before the world rolls out of bed and greets me. It's because of these hours and waking-up habits that I would call myself a morning person.

Though I'm also a sleep person. Y'know, someone who can sleep for 10-12 hours in a stretch. Though those instances are less and less frequent since, well, the dogs wake me up. But they can be satisfied with a quick potty break outside and some breakfast and then I'm allowed to go back to sleep, usually for another couple hours or so.

And all this was working like a well-oiled machine. They wake me up at 6 a.m., eat, back to sleep for two hours, wake me up again for a walk and we start our day. It was a beautiful relationship that ran like clockwork. All of this worked so well beacause I was going to bed by 11 p.m. Ideally, I was in bed reading by 10 p.m. A solid eight hours of sleep has always been my best friend.

Until last week when I started school. Who knew that me waking up to an alarm could be so jarring? Or that because of the alarm, those dogs wake me up EARLIER than 6 a.m. BEFORE the alarm goes off? 

As with every school or work adjustment I've ever made, my schedule is wonky, my eating habits are not consistent and now I have crazy dreams and can't even sleep through the night! *big sigh* 

I find that I'm getting to bed later and later, last night was the earliest in two weeks when I finally decided to call it quits at almost 11 p.m. Even Sunday night was closer to 11:30 and most of last week I saw the terrifying hour of midnight. 

Lately I'm getting home from 12-hour days on campus to dig around for dinner and unwind from the newsroom only to have at least four hours of reading to do, for which it would be nearly impossible for me to stay awake for the entire thing. 

Lest you think I decided to stay awake this morning for the purpose of complaining, because that's just not my style, I am awake to get some reading done. One more chapter before class today. And then after class there are three more and about 10 law cases to brief and understand their impact on laws about my bible, the first amendment. 

But before that all begins again, I'm taking these few moments to morning snuggle with my little corn dog the way I used to. And while I've switched from coffee and oatmeal to tea and fruit, today begins the way I want it to: with quiet reflection, a short planning session for the rest of the day and a little pep talk to get me through it. 

Good morning early morning, it's nice to see you again.


someone else’s schedule

adjustment, career, life, school, work

I'm back at work today.  I'm working all day sitting at a desk and it just feels weird. 

Getting up early didn't change when I started school.  Thanks to a 7:30 morning class I was ready for the day and catching the bus at 7 a.m.  But even then I was walking across campus in the cool morning air working my muscles and huffing my pants up the hill.  During the god-send-breaks between my classes I spent the last couple weeks soaking in some sunshine and working on my tan lines.

I find that I'm getting restless about half way through the day, sitting behind a desk in a windowless office is taking its toll on my sanity.  The decrease in my sanity level is happening a lot faster than it did before.  I'm assuming there will be some sort of adjustment period and I'm hoping to get back in the groove of sitting on my sit bones all day sometime soon.

When I started school it felt very antisocial.  I went to class and didn't talk to anyone, didn't make any friends, no reason to expel words from my mouth for the first month or so. It was one of those things where I knew I was supposed to be there but I didn't quite feel like I belonged there. Work had been such a security blanket and really, I had few friends outside of work.

As I got more involved at the Daily Utah Chronicle I developed new friends, built a fragile little home for myself and began having conversations throughout the day.  Interviewing people for articles helped with that and I'm starting to feel brave about approaching people.  Not totally all the time of course, but it's a work in progress.

Now that I'm back at work I find myself in the same position I was when school started in January.  I know I'm supposed to be here, but I don't quite fit in anymore. So while I spend the next two weeks at work wrapping things up and getting my ducks in a row (quack), I'll work on stretching myself once again. I really enjoy the freedom and sporadic schedule that school offers me. I know that “normal” work hours are… well… normal and that eventually I'll have to go back out into the “real world” and work for The Man once again.

I'm just hoping The Man won't stick me behind a desk in a windowless office for 8 hours a day every day.