Saturday was emotionally weird for me. It was my third day being home without leaving but for a small moment on Friday. I did make sure I showered and got ready. Even if it was past noon (way past) before that happened. No big.
After thinking on it for a while yesterday and again today, I came up with a few reasons I'm in a slump.
I'm not as productive as I'd like to be. I'm pretty sure it's because of my low energy recently. I really packed on the to-do list for awhile there and it did wear me out. Mostly school stress.
There are things I want to happen, but I'm not sure how to make it happen. I don't want to work and work and work and have nothing happen. I'm not afraid of the work work work. I'd welcome it. But I'm not sure how or where to focus my energies to make these things happen. But, a few small windows have opened in this department so I'm looking forward to jumping through them in the near future. There is something to be said for ask and ye shall receive.
I've been stagnant. I've been not moving around much. I get home from work/school and veg on the couch since it's late and I'm tired. I've started doing a bit of yoga in the morning before work and before I go to bed. Not everyday, but I can tell it's helping. I'm sleeping better and moving better through the day. Especially in the cold. I've added a few core exercises and I'm noticing a difference in my posture and back strength/soreness. As always, I highly recommend a bit of yoga for everyone. Also headed out last night to take a stroll in the falling snow. It was magical.
Since I was home for many days in a row, I picked up the last of the Mad Men episodes from the video store. 7 discs in all. 28 hours. And it was awesome. I have Mad Men on the brain now. But one of the things in the last episode has especially stayed with me. Don Draper has started his own agency with the other partners. He's trying to convince Peggy to come with them. He tells her all the reasons she should go. She says, and what will you do if I say no? Don says, I'll spend the rest of my life trying to hire you. Hmm. I could write a whole post on how this stuck with me and all the things it made me think about. Bottom line: is there anyone out there who would spend the rest of their life trying to hire me? I don't really think so. And there is a problem with that. And it's up to me to fix it.
I'm out to conquer the past-due to-do's from the weekend. I'm hoping it'll help me feel a bit better. The TV is off and Christmas music is playing and the snow is falling. It's the perfect time to dance around and get the laundry folded. And put away.